Is failure ever an option?
Ummmmm... yes of course it is. Failure, struggle and disappointment are the common denominators in success.
At 34, I had been married for 13 years, three kids ages 12, 10, and 8, a beautiful home and a happy marriage.
After the real estate crash in 2008 (in Montana), my husband, who was a contractor at the time, was able to keep his business running for a couple more years. With the economy not bouncing back and too much land that was depreciating in value, we decided to throw in the towel. We gave it all back and were determined to move on.
Living in a small town, no matter how much you love it, can kill you. Every where you turn someone knew your business (or thought they knew). Not only did everyone "know you" they wanted to know everything about you and then pass it around. Don't get me wrong, I love where I am from, but at different times in your life, it is necessary to walk away.
So, what to did we do then? We moved down to Utah and my husband enrolled in a pre-med program. He already had a degree in Industrial Design, but with his fear of ever being in an industry so heavily influenced by the rise and fall of the market, he couldn't bear the thought of being so dependent again. I was working a very full week and felt like I missed out on building a close relationship with my children. I was miserable.
After completing the 2 years of the pre-med prerequisites, he applied to dental school.
He didn't get in.
At this point we were both losing our faith. I didn't want to tell him to abandon his dream. He didn't want to disappoint me. So, we never talked about it. These were the hardest times in our lives, and just when we needed each other the most, we pulled away for fear of letting each other down.
Fast Forward. My husband did not pursue dentistry any further. He is now a project manager at a furniture design company. He is happy and we learned how to talk to each other again. I work at home and get to spend the time with my children. Our home is a time capsule from the 50's complete with a bar in the basement, pink and yellow tiled bathrooms (separately of course) and shag carpet. However, our home also has a lot of room for the family and a large stunning back yard. Something I could not live without.
So what did we learn from this?
Even if your dream doesn't work out, it doesn't mean that you won't be happy doing something else.
I think there is so much dreaminess placed on "Do what you love", "follow your passion", that we forget that we may have more than one dream and we may not even know what it is yet.
There is no shame in falling in love with the life you have.
Settling can be a good thing.
Stop assuming you know what God wants for you and making the decisions for god, let him bless your life.
